I am Petteri from Finland and I have something special to share with you: my grandpa. The youth seem to consider the old people rather boring. That might be true in general - but not in this case. My grandpa seems to be having a lot more fun in his 70s than me in my 20s!!

We got him a laptop last Christmas, and by now he's learned to use email - and surf xxx, of course (I've been spying on his surf history...naughty me).

Since I always found my grandpa quite entertaining, I encouraged him to start blogging. To my surprise, he was somewhat
enthusiastic. I guess he just wants to pump up his manliness in the eyes of his alleged net girlfriends.

So, grandpa sends me email about his daily activities, I translate it to English to the best of my ability, and deliver it for your consumption. Enjoy!!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

3 Most Embarrassing Situations I've Found My Grandpa At

While still awaiting a report of Grandpa's angling trip, I thought we could dig a bit deeper into Grandpa's history. Here are three cases, that come to my mind, when I was unusually embarrassed by my Grandpa. There must be many more, and some might be even worse, but these came across right now.

1. Picking up Grandpa from the police station, after he got caught stealing his friend's car.

Grandpa and his pal Eino got this brilliant idea, that they were going to steal their good friend Olli's old crappy Lada 1200, drive it to their mechanic friend so he can install air conditioning to it, and bring the car back before the next morning, which was Olli's birthday. Of course, the neighbors called the police when they saw the two men hustling with the car locks. The police came, put the men in jail for the night, and after a lot of confusion and mediation, they were just given a small fine and let go.

Grandpa called me from the station and told me to pick him up. I went down there, asked for him, and they said he was already released, and they had saw him walk into the bar over the street. I almost said, 'Really, that's not my real grandpa', but I know we look too alike.

I found him in the darkest corner of that bar. All he said was, 'I think it's better not to tell your dad.' We went home in quietude.

2. Finding my Grandpa passed out in a men's room of a restaurant.

This was the only time I've seen him really drunk. Although he probably drinks more beer than water, he usually manages to stay reasonably sober. That day he invited me to have dinner with him in a nice sea food restaurant. I went there, and found him already quite soused. Grandma had left town to visit some relatives, and Grandpa took everything out of the situation.

We ate good, and Grandpa drank good, too. After finishing our herrings, Grandpa went for a pee. I was reading a magazine, and didn't notice the time passing by. Then a waiter came to me, and asked, 'Is that your grandfather in the toilet?' I said yes, realizing he'd been gone for a good while. 'I think he has passed out', the waiter said. Oh my god, I thought, and got all red in the face.

There he was, sitting on a toilet seat, snoring. I woke him up, and lead him out of the men's room. Then I asked for his wallet, and paid our dinner.

Afterwards he was very sorry. He bought me a new watch to make it up.

3. A couple of attractive girls commenting on my Grandpa's ass.

This happened a few years ago, before I had met my wife. We were at a beach with my Mom, Dad and Grandpa on a sunny summer day. I had been eying this nice looking girl sitting there with a friend. But just as I was about to go over to change a few words, the girls headed for the dressing booths to leave. At the same moment, Grandpa decides to go to change his swim trunks on.

I was standing by the showers, when I saw Grandpa with the two girls coming from the booths chatting with each other. I thought, what the heck!?! Grandpa said hi to the girls and went swimming. But the girls saw me, and walked by. 'Nice ass your grandpa's got there!', the other girl said. They went away giggling.

I never asked Grandpa what had happened by the booths. To tell the truth, I don't even want to know.


Sunday, July 27, 2008


Hello again! I promised to tell you about those stitches. I haven't got much time to write right now, because my pal Jamppa is coming to pick me up by taxi soon. We plan to go angling.

To the stitches...I was visiting my friend Akseli that day. He and his wife have a beautiful little farmhouse just a few kilometers out of town. They've got a couple of sheep, a few chicken and even an old pony at their yard for the grandchildren. It's a nice place to swig away a hot summer day.

I was picking up flowers and some fancy looking hay for the wife, when Akseli asked me to go see his Ford Anglia in the barn. Once out of his lady's field of vision, he took out a bottle of Scotch and handed it over. So, I stuffed the flowers in my rear pocket and took a good pull.

Back in the yard, I bowed down to marvel at a freaky centipede. At the same time, I felt an enormous sting in my buttock. Before I even knew it, I had turned around and punched the poor thing in the face. That was when it occurred to me what had happened: a sheep had seen a lunch sticking out of my rear pocket and sinked it's teeth in it! Then it ran around swaying, after receiving such a nasty punch. Although I was in pain, I felt quite sorry for it.

Akseli had to take me to the hospital. They patched my rear together, and sent me home to sip some Cognac.

Now the stitches have been removed, and I can sit on a case of beer by the river again. I just love angling! Who knows, we might even get our hooks in the water this time...